Wednesday, November 11, 2009
... or to Frog or not to Frog?
All was going well as I zipped along on my Soy Mocha Cabled Cardi. I did the bind off for the armholes and put the front portions on holders to work the back. The pattern says, "Bind off 3 sts at beg of next 2 rows. Dec 1 st each side on next row, then every other row 5 times more..." So, I did. Now I am 2" up the back, enjoying the reverse stockinette stitch, because, after all, it is comfortably automatic.
Then it hit me, I was actually making my decreases on the edge. You know the mental gymnastics we all go through, "Does it matter? Will anyone really notice? I mean, it is rev st st; it's not like it was frontwise st st, and the decreases would show that much. And I was just following the pattern..."
Like mindless stockinette stitch, we can go through days, weeks, months, virtually on automatic. The things we do or say to the people in our lives just fly by and everybody moves on, right? Those we profess to love should just know to take us for who we are and not "sweat the small stuff". If someone is hurt in the process, well, those are the lumps of life that we all have to swallow. But what if we have the opportunity for a "do over"? To go back and do the things that make our loved ones feel more valued, or say something in a less destructive way -- would we?
We create the relationships we have. And even those blood connections that we had no choice in creating, are ours to nurture or ravage, to knit into something serviceable or hide away in a dark closet like dimestore acrylic. When it's up to me, what words will I allow to fall on the ears of those around me? Caustic or kind, it's my choice. And if I learn that something I have done has caused pain to someone, what will I do? Will I leave it "as is", thinking maybe it wouldn't really be noticed? Or will I go back and do everything in my power to make it right?
My choice? I'm going to ribbit, ribbit, ribbit...